You're different, not worse
Depending on when you were diagnosed with ADHD, and how you family, friends, teachers, and employers reacted to it, you may have some internalized negative feelings about yourself and your ADHD.
I believe with all of my heart that you’re different, not worse.
While ADHD absolutely creates some challenges, many of the difficulties associated with it are the result of living in a world designed around the needs and preferences of neurotypical folks.
As a thought exercise, imagine if we talked to neurotypical people the way they often talk to us…
- “You’re too worried about boring stuff. You need to learn to have fun.”
- “You’re too focused on the future. Live in the moment more!”
- “Your house will just get dirty again tomorrow, but fun is fleeting. Go enjoy the day while you can!”
- “Why can’t you just say what you mean instead of tip-toeing around it?”
- “It’s so sad that you control your emotions instead of allowing yourself to experience them fully.”
- “Why did you work on this project all week when you could have just knocked the whole thing out the day before and don’t other stuff with your time instead?”
- “You couldn’t come up with more than two ideas? Why not? This is easy!”
What I hope you’ll take from this is a few things…
- Every strength has a corresponding downside, and vice versa.
- Neurotypical life isn’t better. It’s just different, with its own pros and cons.
- A lot of what feels bad about having ADHD is internalized ableism.
I won’t deny that there are things that suck about ADHD. But a lot of what’s “bad” about ADHD only feels that way because society says so.
Your different, not worse. ❤️